I have been looking for you for months. I want to take you home and paint you and make pretty pillows for you so you feel super special. Why are you hiding and teasing me so? I know you are out there. I have waited for you at Goodwill, I have looked for you on Craigslist. I will do whatever it takes to have you in my home. (OK, not anything, but I will go to extremes...)
Your ugly cousins are all creeping on me. I see them everywhere. They are at Goodwill, they are on Craigslist, they are sitting at the end of people's driveways. I don't want them, I want you.
So show your face dear sweet, lovely, bench with a curved back and no storage compartment.